an inquiry of me

Riverton Demolition Derby

2011-07-10T21:01:00.000-06:00

this guy wanted to pose for this pic, he asked me to tag him, but I think he was kidding cause I don't know him.

MINI DONUTS IN A BUCKET!! , I didn't have a one, cause blast my life.. FOOD ALLERGIES!! they smelled DELISH.

CRUNCH

SMOKE and

this little guy making me night, youngest mechanic on the circuit!

Making the rounds with Meliss and her Fam... Our Adventure packed simmer has only begun! WHOOP WHOOP!!

RODEOS AND DEMOLITION DERBIES!! oh bless my heart!

Horses

2011-07-07T15:43:00.000-06:00

there is an island back home that I would past on my way to the beach in the summer, and on that island there were horses that lived; It would make my day to see them running all over.

This wasn't an island, it was the arena at Strawberry Days, but it brought back a memory that I thought I lost.

She buoys me up...and let's me have strawberry and creme

2011-07-07T15:41:00.000-06:00

We like Strawberries and Creme

Strawberry Days

On the Rodeo Circuit.....

I'll say it again

2011-07-06T15:03:00.000-06:00

I said it once before, and I'll say it again... there is no such thing as secrets..but on the bright side, realizing the value of 2nd chances, and not relieving the past ( again); but making the most the future..
I've learned something about regret. Regret is a wasted emotion, because regret doesn't change a thing. Wait, maybe that's a lie...regret can cut so deep you never want that kind of hurt to come again, and that is all the good regret has to offer.

I want this look

2011-02-01T10:54:00.002-07:00

It makes a sound, your heart does...

2010-12-09T13:33:00.002-07:00

When you’re quiet enough, lost in the day dreaming of missed opportunities, you hear things. When all is quiet and you have a moment to think with regret the things you wished you would’ve done, should’ve done, could’ve done... when you think of all that might have been and you think with longing for the things that you thought would happen, but instead that you are still waiting for…in that moment when all is quiet and you're thinking on the memories and dreams…when it’s that quiet, you can hear the sound your heart makes when it breaks.

Amie Miriello Hey

2010-12-09T09:47:00.000-07:00

I let you touch my face

2010-12-08T11:37:00.001-07:00

And memories are coming back to me today, as I sit and write about you. There is so much I think about when I remember you; like how I've always hated it when my face was touched, but I remember your hands on my face, and how I didn’t pull away. I remember my hand in yours and how your fingers fit around mine. I remember your smile and the way your whole face lit up when you talked of flying and music and what it was like to have moments when the voices stopped and you could just be happy. We loved the quiet moments and missed them, the fewer they got.

I write about you twice a year. On your birthday and every year around this time, because it's Christmas time, and you loved mistletoe and kissing….and I sit as the memories come flooding back, and have to smile at what was. It’s only at these times when I think about all that was good that I am not sad about the time we missed out on, about all the memories that we didn’t have.

You wanted to fly, and you wanted to play music. I wanted to watch all your dreams come true. I wanted to be there when they came true for you.

I don’t like my face being touched, but I never minded it when you held my face in your hands… I’m remembering so much today, as I sit and write about you… you are some of my best memories…

Jr High Excitement

2010-11-30T04:24:00.001-07:00

It is like when I was in middle school. Every Fall, every summer, the night before going to camp with my youth group, I couldn't sleep. I waited to the last minute to pack every time, and I stayed up all night and thought about what that weekend or what that would week would mean to me.. All the excitement boiling up in me would not let me sleep. I'd "over pack" and not even be the slightest bit tired in the morning when it time to take off, only when my youth leader turned on Enya, and we started out on our way cuddled up with our friends in my church's 15 passenger vans did I shut my eyes and relax and take a nap before I experienced the time that I've been waiting for.
I'm going home for the first time in like 11 years. I'm going to visit my friends, see my birth dad and breath in the North Carolina air, and maybe play in the rain, but I'm going home, and I couldn't be more excited. It's the middle of the night, the butt crack of morning, and the sun is going to rise, and I haven't slept.. I'm packed and so ready.. and the excitement is boiling up inside. I'm anxious and over whelmed. This is the house I grew up in , I loved here, I loved it because of my friends... I loved it here..

I've got Jr High School Excitement , and I'm going home...

Over the Rhine - Born

2010-11-29T01:32:00.000-07:00

when I watch tv late at night, I sometimes hear the saddest songs.. and sometimes I love sad songs

daydreaming

2010-11-21T20:38:00.002-07:00

I just wanted to know what it would’ve been like to have you in my life forever…to not have to say good bye and to have you next to me, for always. I wanted to know what it would have been like if you were mine…

Sitting on the front porch

2010-11-21T17:11:00.000-07:00

Years from now, when we're sitting on the front porch; we're going to be talking about the times that we remember most. You'll say my laugh is what you heard first, and like everyone else you'll say I was and I am sunshine. I'll tell you that you were the only one I let touch my face. We'll sit quietly not talking about all the time we wasted not saying all the things we were too afraid to say, we still won't say those things....

mozella can't stop

2010-11-18T10:31:00.000-07:00

2010-11-11T09:36:00.002-07:00

Sometimes I push away those I want to keep close, just to see if they’ll stay, because I want them to stay. Sometimes people just want to know that you are willing to fight for them, that far past everything else in the world, you want to be a part of them as much as they want to be a part of you. That they believe in you, and they are every bit worthy of you and what you have to offer, because to them, you have EVERYTHING to offer. Some people walk away, but walk away slowly because they want you to ask them not to go. Some people run so that you’ll chase them, and some people just keep you at arm’s length so they have you at a safe distance. A distance where fear is the wall and pain is the road block. We are all judgers and will judge each other based on what someone else has done to us… to protect ourselves from future pain, future hurt, repeat sorrow? Sometimes the walls we put up to keep pain out, keep out joy. The guards we have to defend our hearts from sorrow keep out the love that wants to come in.

What does Love Cost

2010-11-08T22:00:00.000-07:00

Being in Love is NOT free... it cost so much, more than you ever thought you had to give, and it doesn't give refunds, or exchanges, and each new purchase you make, causes you to spend a little more.

Hello...hello..over here

2010-11-05T20:08:00.001-06:00

You see right through me, not into me knowing me. You see right through me, straight through me,right past me. You see right through me,cause I'm invisible to everyone. I'm invisible to Everyone, including you.

You don't know me either

like them....

You don't know me either.

Right One, Wrong Time

2010-11-04T16:12:00.000-06:00

Do you ever meet someone, I don't know, someone comes into your life and the moment they enter it, you wonder, where you were before, what was it that kept you from meeting earlier? Where were they, where were you when you should've started? Or seriously, this is the "right time”, this time was when it was all to happen, why not sooner? I feel like I missed out on so much, and it hurts so much. Like this card my parents gave me once for my birthday that said that there was a hole in their heart, a piece missing from their family they didn’t know was there until I filled it. I feel so cheated. Time is not a good friend. What would have it been like if time could have been nicer to us, if paths came crossed at the earlier points. Did I not look up in a class at school? Did you pass me at a party and forgot to take a second look?

“The Right one at the Wrong time” that’s who I am….

2010-11-03T08:40:00.002-06:00

When you think of me; I'm everything you know you wanted, I'm everything you've always needed. I'm that girl & you know it.

Matt Nathanson - Come On Get Higher

2010-11-03T00:22:00.000-06:00

2010-11-03T00:03:00.000-06:00

Losing someone to death is the easiest goodbye, you only have to say it once, saying it everyday scars the heart with every intake of breath.

The heart wasn't made to take on that kind of hurt, the kind of hurt where scars are opened everyday with thoughts of what might have been revisited...

2010-11-01T11:03:00.002-06:00

you can miss something that was never your's. you can miss something you never had, but wanted. you can miss it so much you feel it in the heartache.
it's a real pain, that causes real tears, and leaves you with an ache like a missing body part that should be there, but isn't. all that from something that wasn't even your's.

The Wonder Years - Kevin and Winnie Clip Reel

2010-10-31T23:36:00.000-06:00

What becomes of the broken hearted? Happiness is just an illusion....

Who you are vs. Everyone Else

2010-10-25T15:17:00.004-06:00

Nathaniel Hawthorne once wrote: No man, for any considerable period can wear one face to himself and another to the multitude without finally getting bewildered as to which may be the true..

“To be nobody but yourself in a world which is doing its best, night and day, to make you everybody else means to fight the hardest battle which any human being can fight; and never stop fighting”

In high school, on pep squad, there was this chant, " Let's Go.... Let's Fight... Let's Win...Let's Go, Let's Fight, Let's Win Tonight."

So much of our time is spent trying to fit in with what everyone wants of us, who they want us to be, what they want us to do. I use to think that only girls have the problem of losing themselves in order to fit, but I have come to find out that all of us at some time , try to fit in the puzzle that is someone else's game. We shave away the pieces of ourselves in order to fit in, and be noticed ( Square peg, round hole) losing our authentic selves in an effort to be pleasing.. I know first hand what that can do to someone, and how awful it is to look in the mirror and not recognize the person looking back at you. It's a long road back to who you really are, if you go long enough being someone you're not.

This is in addition to the previous post from an hour or so ago... I'm doing a lot of pondering today... so this is what I can share.

xoxo

ps.
“Do not let your fire go out, spark by irreplaceable spark, in the hopeless swamps of the approximate, the not-quite, the not-yet, the not-at-all. Do not let the hero in your soul perish in lonely frustration for the life you deserved, but have never been able to reach. Check your road and the nature of your battle. The world you desired can be won. It exists, it is real, it is possible, it is yours.”

Choices We Make

2010-10-25T14:12:00.000-06:00

There are moments in our lives when we find ourselves at a crossroad, afraid, confused, without a roadmap. The choices we make in those moments can define the rest of our days. Of course when faced with the unknown, most of us prefer to turn around and go back. There comes a time when every life goes off course. In this desperate moment you must choose your direction. Will you fight to stay on the path while others tell you who you are? Or will you label yourself? Will you be honored by your choice? Or will you embrace your new path? Each morning you choose to move forward or to simply give up…..

not every one is the same

2010-10-03T23:01:00.001-06:00

"the hardest thing in the world is having a good man, after you've had a bad one."

I didn't say it

2010-09-27T21:34:00.000-06:00

do you ever wish you could go back in time and say what you wanted to say, at the very moment you should've said it? I'm not talking about some snippy comeback, or sharp reply.. I just mean.. well, I don't think anything is every going to be as sad as missing the opportunity to say something at the one time it should have been heard by others... what the heck is wrong with me I never speak up..

Plastic Beauty Queens

2010-09-22T00:09:00.000-06:00

I Feel

2010-09-04T23:56:00.000-06:00

He said, " Safe, when I'm with you, I feel safe...and at home."

What a wonderful feeling to have, when you feel that...

Isaac Russell - Lighthouse

2010-09-04T10:48:00.000-06:00

I Love my friend Isaac...

What in the Future ?

2010-09-03T09:37:00.000-06:00

Harry Potter is not real ( Although a really great series that I've read several times as well as seen EVERY movie, even the one with spiders) There is NO SUCH THING as magic... but today I wish there was. Today I wish Divination was real and I could pull out the old crystal ball and see what's in store for me. Was I always this IMPATIENT, good gosh... I'm standing still and inside screaming like Jane and Michael in Mary Poppins, " CAN WE GO, CAN WE GO"Can I JUST GO.. I have so much I want, I think that is where the problem lies.. wanting too much and not grateful enough for where I am at and what I have.. People can get lost in the wanting..but I also want to KNOW, I NEED TO KNOW.. I need a peek like a little kid covering their eyes and looking through the spaces in between their fingers... I want to see what I'm not allowed to..

I'm so anxious I can't stand myself. I think I may be having a week.. I wish I knew..I just want to know what's in store...I mean... I just want a peek.. I'm the girl that if you've already seen the movie, I'll beg you to tell me the ending.. but I'll still want to see for myself... If you've read the book, tell me how it ends, but I'll still stay up reading every page. I need to know what to expect, should I brace myself for a bumpy ride, should I stretch out my arms and feel the wind on my faceand enjoy the moment because I'll want it to last forever?

Heaven Help me...

....choosing

2010-09-02T23:41:00.000-06:00

"sometimes you just have to choose to have faith, even though it's hard..."

If You REALLY Knew Me

2010-08-31T22:16:00.000-06:00

So, I read my friend Kaycee's blog and she had a post about this show on MTV called, " If You Really Knew Me".. oh good grief. I took the challenge and watched it and bawled my eyes the whole time. I wonder if they had had this when I was younger if I would be different, or healthier. It hit a little too close to home, and even now when I want to go on and on about what I wish people knew about me.. I don't dare say it... any of it. I think Kaycee is rad though, we are SO different and I bet we're alot a like.

If you Really knew me.. you'd know that I am a fortress.... some say I can't keep a secret, but the truth is that I have lots, and most of them are about me and the things I'll never tell...

2010-08-30T23:55:00.000-06:00

Sometimes I wish I was little again..when nothing mattered and there were no hard choices.. when things were simple and I was more free..

I was the one,

who would always

jump in first

Didn't think twice

to look behind

Got such a good feeling,

just from playing

in the dirt

Once,

when I was little

We could build a rocket,

fly to the moon

Leave Tuesday morning,

and be back for noon

There wasn't nothing,

nothing that we couldn't do

Once, when I was little umm

Once, when I was little

Yeah I could dream more then

Yeah I believed more then

That the world

could only get better

Yeah I was free more then

I could pretend more then

That this life could

only show me good times

Once, when I was little

umm ohh lalala

There was a time

when I trusted everyone

Yes I did

There was no place

that I would not go oh no

Spend a day on the hillside

next to the holly mo

Oh once, when I was little

Yea once, when I, I was little

Yeah I could dream more then

Yeah I believe more then

That this world

could only get better

Yeah I was free more then

I could pretend more then

That this life could

only show me good times

Once, when I was little

Used to feel so strong

Even when they tell me,

tell me I was wrong

That I can't live

in a magic world

Cause it's time

for me to grow up

That I got to be

like the rest of them

When I know

there acting up ohh

I could believe more

then yes I could

I could pretend more then

That this life could

only get better

I could believe more

then yes I could

I could pretend more then

That this world could

only show me good times

Once, when I was little

When I was little

So here comes the next one,

the next in line

Stay as young you can,

for the longest time

Cause those days flew by

Like a breeze

just passing through

Once, when I was little

I Freaking need a piece of candy!

2010-08-30T13:50:00.000-06:00

I just had a break down.. my computer wasn't working right, I feel like I haven't done a ding dang thing.. I lost it, and cried in Becky's office.. She told me I needed a piece of candy... I gave up sugar and soda.. I cheated the other day here at work, and had a migraine all weekend long when I gave it up again.. CRAP.. I will not have the candy.. I'll just have a breakdown every now and then til this part is over.. Please bear with me...

what a dream

2010-08-25T20:26:00.001-06:00

I want a place all of my own. I want a place that is mine so I can put up artsy pictures and lovely paintings. I want to decorate all over and I want my place to scream, " SOMEONE WONDERFUL LIVES HERE" I want to sit on my couch and have deep meaningful conversations with my friends, or just shoot the bull over cold raspberry lemon aid with sprigs of mint.

I want to move on

I want pretty music playing in the background of my life. I want to wake up in an over sized bed with the sun shinning in on me.

This one time, I saw this movie....

2010-08-25T20:01:00.001-06:00

There is a car in a ditch and oil is leaking and the engine is hot... He goes to be with her while he waits for help. He holds her hand. She can't see him. There is dust and dirt in her eyes, and she's crying, and the gash on her her head is bleeding, so he let's her know that it's okay." Just keep your eyes closed. I'm going to stay right here and tell you everything that is going on. You'll be okay"
" I'm scared," She says.
" Don't think about that, you're going to be okay. Hey....25 years from now, if you could be anywhere in the world, where would you be?
" My anniversary party." She sighs
" Who's at this party?"
" My kids, boys... Sam, and Charlie"
" What's the best thing about being married for 25 years?"
She smiles through the pain and strongly, turned upside down in the car that is leaking oil on a hot engine she says, " My husband. They say for better or worse, but with us.. it just gets better and better. He's my best friend. What about you?"
He wipes away some of the blood on her forehead, " my wife, after 25 years. I still can't get her off my mind. She's everything to me."

Dang it I really need to stop watching LifeTime Television for Women... it perpetuates my unrealistic views of relationships.... Good Grief! Bless my heart

God it's Me...remember me

2010-08-24T11:18:00.000-06:00

Dear Heavenly Father,

Are ya there, It’s me Michelle Cordon Lepinski. I just have a couple of questions regarding my life. I know that there are no refunds or exchanges, and I’m not asking for any changes in policy. I think that maybe I forgot to read the fine print. I mean, SERIOUSLY, this is what I signed up for? I mean don’t get me wrong; with all that I’ve experienced in my life.. I’m sitting really pretty right now. I mean, I’m a part of an AMAZING family that loves me unconditionally and in no means ever makes me feel that I am anything but theirs, and oh my gosh, you’ve given me the most wonderful of friends that anyone can ask for ( please remove the crazies from my life if you can, I mean, they aren’t really my friends anyways) I have a pretty decent job and most of my days are filled with laughter ( I contribute that to the laugh bank that I keep in my head with the funny stories I hear), but Heavenly Father, it saddens me to tell ya this, but this morning I woke up with the worse feeling. With everything that you’ve blessed me with, I woke up this morning with the most intense feeling of wanting. It was so intense that it hurt and I wanted to cry. Not like cry like I did at season 4 of or 2 for that matter of Grey’s Anatomy , but like really cry, like when your heart is missing something or someone so bad all you can do is cry, kind of cry.

What I’m trying to say is that I feel like my life is on pause in a way. Like someone hit the pause button when I have so much more left to do and experience . My mind is in forward motion, everything else around me seems to be moving ahead, but me, my body and my life are just standing still. I want to GO GO GO, and nothing is going on. What’s that about Heavenly Father, who hit the pause button? Was it hit by accident? Or is this it? Is this the life I signed up for, is this all I get? I feel like so much more should happen before it’s all done, and time is running out. Hmmm, could ya let me know somehow some way or another, what I should look for.. I mean, I know you don’t want to give me a date, or a time frame or anything, but a sense of peace that , that there is more to come; that would do just fine. Yes please, that will do just fine… Just saying

Love Me

I'm totally Random

2010-08-06T11:46:00.006-06:00

“Sometimes we waste our words and we waste our moments, and we don’t take the time to say what’s in our hearts when we have the chance… and with that ; in the end, what we regret are the chances we never took. “

Please Bless my walls come down and not another moment is wasted..not another one.
I still jump in a puddle after a good rain fall
I still eat push pops on a summer day when it’s so hot I can’t stand it
My favorite color is still pink
I still swing on swings and look for four leaf clovers
I love the way sand feels between my toes and how the ocean feels in the middle of the night when no one is around, because it does feel different.
I dance around when no one is watching, and even if they are, I don’t mind
I love the way music moves me to write or dance, but most importantly it reminds me to feel.
I get so wrapped up in the feeling of love that when I have it, that I want to have that feeling forever … I’ll hold on for dear life to love
I enjoy the sound of quiet
I love clean laundry fresh from the dryer
I don’t mind the idea of being a stay at home mom… I look forward to just being home with kids and keeping house
I want a craft room in my dream house so I can have a room to sew and paint in
And I want a library filled with books that I use to read when I was little ,that I can one day read to my own kids, like “ Adventures of the Box Car Children” ,“Ramona Quimby age 8” and “ A Tale of Two Cities”
I saw a colt get born once and then I wanted to live on a ranch
I kinda like the smell of farms and ranches
I like to spin around in chairs that swivel like a three year old
I want to make the most of every moment because I know how quickly times flies and I know what the regret of not enjoying life feels like and I never want to look back and say,
“ I could’ve, I should’ve, I would’ve , but I didn’t…”

My Birthday was Tuesday!

2010-08-05T21:30:00.002-06:00

I was born on Aug. 3rd.. My Birth dad said it was the greatest day of his life. I doubt a lot of things.. I have so many questions, but there is one thing that I hold dearest to my heart, and that is how much my daddy loves me. I won't pretend that we didn't have rocky times over the years. I was a brat growing up.. attention seeking, reckless and sometimes well.. it doesn't matter. He loved me through it all. And he was no picnic either. He was strict, quiet, heavy handed and intimidating, but no matter what he always told me how much I was wanted and loved. He brushed my hair and got me ready for school. He picked me from practices, he missed me when I went away to camp, he prayed for me when times were hard...
He told me often the story of when I was born and said, " Like God knew Jacob in the old testament before he was born, I knew you. I asked for you like Abraham and Sarah begged for Isaac. I begged for you. "
( Daddy is REALLY religious and French, so he told me LONG speeches, that I never appreciated until he stopped giving them to me)

I don't think there is a greater love than that of a father for his baby girl.

A good day

2010-08-02T18:26:00.003-06:00

Right now at this moment, I can’t imagine being any happier.. I want to feel like this forever.. Dear Lord, don’t let anything mess this up. My cup runneth over… Yes, right now… this is what happiness is and I want to keep it with me.

Family....it's always about time....

2010-07-21T14:02:00.000-06:00

I’m really lucky, no blessed to have the family that I have right now. I have a wonderful relationship with my birth father and that will always be the case. I just wanted to take this moment to say how grateful I am for my adopted family. I love them so much, and for all the love they have given me, and support they have bestowed upon me… I can’t imagine who I would be without them. I just love them all… my parents, siblings, aunts, uncles, cousins, and grandparents…. They are part of my world. It’s a nice feeling … love of a family.

Come here for a minute

2010-07-15T16:19:00.003-06:00

Come here for a minute, well it might take longer than that, but come here.

I want to tell you something. I want to tell you every truth I’ve ever known about me. Every truth and every lie, all the things that I’ve never told anyone before; I want to tell you.

I want to show you something. The scar on my elbow and I'll tell how I got it, the one on my shoulder that no one's seen before. I want to show you the cut that I got on my heart that someone else put there when they left me behind. I want to show you the person I am who not many people have had the chance to meet. Hold my hand, hold me close; listen to everything I have to say, look at me, see me and stay right here… Right here …right here next to me when I’m done sharing and stay…

OneRepublic - Secrets

2010-06-17T18:06:00.000-06:00

there are no such things as secrets, it's just something that we tell ourselves to help us think that the little things we think we are hiding will be hide. Secrets are our comfort, they are part of the disguise that we cloak ourselves in. Pretending that something isn't what it is, and something else is.... a secret is just a lie we tell ourselves when we rather have a lie than the truth.

secrets secrets are no fun, secrets secrets hurt someone...

Sometimes.....

2010-06-10T16:47:00.002-06:00

Sometimes…..

Sometimes I give more than I get

I smile when I want to cry

I listen and nod when I want to say, “You’re full of *crap”

Say please and thank you when someone doesn’t deserve the courtesy

Laugh, even though what I think was said, wasn’t funny at all…

I’m nice to people who were mean to me

I love people who don’t love me

Compliment people who’ve insulted me

Sometimes I fake it

Sometimes I’m fake

Don't know much ( with lyrics ) - Linda Ronstadt and Aaron Neville.

2010-05-28T11:00:00.000-06:00

another one

2010-05-25T22:57:00.000-06:00

okay.. so I haven't been the best at keeping at this blog.. remember that one time I promised to write everyday for the rest of the year? yeah, I'm sorry about that. nevertheless... I'm going to be better.. I need something to keep me busy.. and what could be a better way, than TWO BLOGS?!?! That's right, I'm going to have another blog.. a funny one.. well, sometimes it will be funny..
You see, I send these random texts to my friends, and they're called " Dear Body" and well, one day, we were like, " Oh, Michelle, this should be a book..." and I was like, " Oh my goodness, I'd make MILLIONS!! " and then I thought, oh hmmm... a blog would be better. I've been so lazy at blogging ( Sorry Charlotte, but at least I admitted it) that I forgot everything about blogging.. So my wonderful sister is going to help me with the banner and the background.. Anyways, I just wanted to give everyone a heads up.. Coming to your pc in the next few days.. " Dear Body" I hope you'll love it!

State Farm Car Insurance... I don't like you right now.. not one bit

2010-02-01T16:21:00.002-07:00

Dear State Farm in Orem UT, the Bob Clark Office,

State Farm came HIGHLY recommend to me by friends in North Carolina, and in fact I’ve used State Farm in North Carolina before and loved them, which is why I chose you guys again as I have since decided to purchase a new car and wanted to have different insurance. Apparently, there in the Great State of North Carolina customer service is provided and I’ve learned that here in Utah, you guys must not care at all; or, maybe you could just give a rats behind.
I called you guys a few weeks ago for the paper work I would need to have proof of insurance in my car, that was the same time as I paid my bill. You guys verified the address with me on the phone, which is the same address where my bill comes promptly to my mailbox, but still I have no proof of insurance. I called you guys on Saturday and left a message, this morning you called me and said that you sent the paper work to an address **** N *** E, um, that is NOT my address, and yet the lovely lady, Doreen who called me back claims that, that address is the one that you have on file for me. Um, what you should’ve done was tell the truth. The lady on the phone said she would mail and email it to me, and then dismissed me. I would’ve been fine with an apology and an, “ We’ll make sure that gets mailed out today.” I am not happy with being dismissed!
No I’m sorry; I’M NOT A HAPPY CUSTOMER. I called back and left a message for Grant to call me back. Now Grant you were so eager beaver to get my money, but you didn’t feel it was appropriate to make sure that the person that gives y’all money for her insurance was a satisfied customer. All you had to do, was remedy the situation, apologize for YOUR mistake, and by doing so remove the distain that I now feel for State Farm insurance in UTAH COUNTY, ( as North Carolina, you’re still okay in my book.) What you said was, well, I’ll email you one, is there anything else I can do? And when I said, No, I’m just not happy with the service that I was given, you said. “Okay Bye” and hung up the phone!
Now with internet an every growing source of information and social networking sites the way that they are in the year 2010, do you really think that it was a good idea to treat a new customer the way you did. Now I’ve been told to find a new insurance company to go with… and I’ve thought about it these past few hours as I am still a bit hot about the way you chose to dismiss my concerns.
I don’t have the most costly of insurance with you guys… I was testing you out, do I really want to spend a lot of money on an insurance company that fails to send me the paper work I need. I mean SERIOUSLY, what if I was to need a claim filed? Would I get the same treatment as I have with something so small as proof of insurance papers? State Farm in Utah County. YOU FAILED!!
I believe in customer service, I believe in treating people fairly. I am not pleased with you guys at all. Your customer service in all fairness SUCKS.

Sincerely,
Michelle L.
Utah

I don't know about your god Pat Robertson... but my God is awesome

2010-01-14T20:38:00.004-07:00

I don't normally watch the news.. I don't claim to be one who's in on the what's going ons in the world... I'm like Alan Jackson in that since. But I can be lead to feel strongly about things, and when I do.. I'm in it full force.. I don't go around talking about my religion, or how devout I am. I take a softer approach and hopefully live a life in which people want to ask me what I believe...
I'm Christian.. I believe in Jesus, and God, and I believe in Humanity, and Love, and being kind to people, and not judging people who don't believe the way I do, or live the way I do.. and I'm southern.. and if you piss me off, I'll probably hold a grudge for a really long time, which isn't very God like of me, but Jesus saves... so I'm good when I say.. Pat Robertson.. what you said about Haitians deserving the Earthquake that nearly destroyed their homeland that they love makes you an awful and rude who says that stuff like that?.. you make Christians and Republicans look bad.. but thank heavens I know some of both those groups who are NOTHING like you... ( as if he's reading this.. I'm on a rant) and then to hear Rush said some of the similar.. well, Rush has always been wrong in my book anyways... IDIOTS.

Well... anyways, I claim the southern part of me more than the Haitian part of me, but I am Haitian, and for my birth dad who still has family there, loved ones there.. I felt deeply... and will pray for until things are well again in their country, and in their hearts..

and Keith Olberman is a much better speaker than I am.. and I will say, that I don't agree with EVERYTHING he says or appears to stand for, but for this..I'll give him a hell yeah, and a clap...

by the way, I feel strongly that my God is an awesome God.. he loves everyone and thinks of everyone...when we hurt, he hurts, and when we pray, he listens.. and when we stand need in of comfort, he comforts us.. there are over 6 billion people on this planet.. and My God watches ALL of us...and most of the time, when he answers our prayers, it's through someone that he sends directly to us to see us through..He smart.. and Forgiving....

So Pat and Rush, my God forgave you for what y'all said, but I still think ya'll are ________

oh my..the social security office.....

2010-01-13T08:51:00.005-07:00

I had to go to the social security office to get paper work for my new job ( that's right I got a new job FINALLY, more on that later), but I lost my card and had to get a replacement...I needed one anyways since I got a new last name (thanks new family).... someone told me to get there right when it opens.. I didn't listen.. I got there at 9:45am rather than at 9am...
I wish I could blog from my phone, but since I can't .. I just texted my friends Becky and Merrianne my morning there....

Text 1
Me: CRAP, the Social Security office is PACKED!!!
Becky: Boo
Merrianne: is the line Crazy long
Me: My number is A155

I watch as the man is falling asleep and his kids are giggling about it.. his daughter keeps poking him when he seems to be really asleep.. his son takes a different approach and throws his jacket at him which smacks him square in the face! His wife see the whole thing and does NOTHING!!

A man limps away from one of the open windows where he was being "helped" and says loudly for everyone to hear.. " WELL THAT WAS A BIG WASTE OF MY TIME!!! BEEN HERE OVER AN HOUR FOR TWO MINUTES OF NOT A BIT OF HELP!! "

Um...he waited for over an hour.. crap..

Number 37... Number 37

SWEAR WORD, my number is A155!!!!!!

oh finally, a chair to sit in....

There is a lady who's nosey asking everyone why they are here today..

I've been sitting for I think 15 minutes now..

the man with the bratty kids fell asleep and I guess his daughter stopped poking him awake, because he missed his number being called...

SS worker: I'm sorry, we called that number, and you didn't come.. where you here? You'll have to get a new number

Man: I didn't hear you call my number, and the number you are on has surpassed the number that I have .

(Who uses surpassed in this situation)

SS worker: YOU NEED TO GET A NEW NUMBER AND WAIT FOR IT TO BE CALLED.

ouch

NUMBER A129

*sigh*

This lady walks in and despite the hat she is wearing, her EARS ARE HUGE.. oh, and let me not forget to mention that this woman is NOT wearing a bra to hold up her breast that are probably bigger than mine were before my reduction procedure.. GOOD GOSH WOMAN!!! Did her two daughters that she came with not mention that maybe a bra would be a good thing to not forget when out in public...

There is an Arab man that apparently works with just the Arabs, because when he goes to his window, the two Arab gentleman sitting behind me, get up and he immediately helps them, and then leave..

um, how long were they here?

Number 43.... Number A140

Number A 140 apparently has been using the wrong name her whole life, because it's suppose to be one name, but on her card it says a different name..even her momma thought she as Debbie.. nope.. she's Deborah the SS worker tells her....

Text 3? Where has the time gone?
Me: A meth head chick just walked in... she keeps twitching and scratching her head.. she gets helped RIGHT away!

Merriane: HA HA HA HA HA HA HA WOW

Text 4:
Me: Why the hell does this kid keep yelling ," MOM, Mom, MOMMY, MOMMY, MOM, MOMMY, MOM, MOM, MOM ( insert SCREAMING NOW topped with CRYING) MOM MOM MOMMY MOM.." this kid sat so quietly the whole time they were waiting, and NOW, he PICKS NOW to need something!!!! UGH

NUMBER A155

Me: Praise the Lord, they called my number!!!!

time spent at the window.... 5 minutes
time spent waiting...2 HOURS

note to self...keep your card in a safe place, that you can remember!

2009-12-03T19:46:00.002-07:00

" This life is a test
It's only a test
Had it been an actual life;
you would have received further instructions...
on where to go and what to do"

this is just a teaser... my apologies for not blogging like I should.. FORGIVE

2009-11-08T20:01:00.001-07:00

this makes me a titch happy... it belongs on the soundtrack of my life

Confessions of a grade school con artist

2009-05-03T00:24:00.004-06:00

( Oh Charlotte, you love these stories )

I was young...it was the summer of 2nd grade...and I had two best friends in the neighborhood I lived in, their names were Angie and Portia, yes Portia.. we swam at the pool all summer and played at each other's houses.. we traded dolls,and well here's the story....
Micheal Jackson came out with we are the world and they were showing an old show of all the actors and singers who sang on the album and watched it at my house, Portia and I, and then we were told to go out and play so we did, but outside we had nothing to play...and not to say that it was all Portia's idea, but Angie was gone that weekend and back then I can't remember if I was a follower or a leader, but Portia said we should collect some money for the kids in Africa, and I thought that was a dumb idea because we had no way to send it to Africa, and Portia said,
" Michelle, we're two little black girls, we could be starving kids from Africa." ( okay, she might not have worded it like that for sure, but I can't remember what she said for sure..)
What I do remember is that ten minutes later, I was holding a bucket as she rang the neighbors door bells and saying,
" Hi, I'm Michelle and this is Portia and we are raising money for the we are the world for our school, would you like to help starving children in Africa?"
and the bucket got filled...
There was a mom and pop pizza place not far out of our neighborhood and we could walk to it without getting into trouble, because we weren't crossing busy streets or anything.... a medium cheese pizza and a 2 liter of soda would cost us around seven dollars and some change.. after ten minutes of coning and checking with the pizza man, we were a few dollars short, so we took our lying seven year old behinds back out into the neighborhood and knocked on a few more doors...
Cheese was the only topping we could agree on, and we took our pizza behind Portia's house and ate a slice each...My mother yelled for me to come in after I had only had a slice and a sip of soda, and Portia's mom's boyfriend had come home at the same time.. we threw the pizza away and I went home.
I remember at some time feeling a bit sorry that we weren't giving the money to the we are the world, but my seven year mind, and now my adult mind agree.. IT WAS SUMMER, those people believed it was for a school project IN THE SUMMER, who does school in the summer.....

Thanks Austin, you saved my life...Well, my paper

2008-12-04T16:07:00.005-07:00

This post is dedicated to Austin, the nice guy at the UVU Library that helped me find some articles so I could finish my paper on Post Modernity and Zygmunt Bauman... I hear that collective sigh from all of you.. I hear Barb saying, " yeah sweetie, good luck with that."
Well I totally rocked my class presentation on him.. Everyone said... but this paper has to be PERFECT!! I need to pass this class to graduate and I think I'm acing all my other ones...so, this class, Contemporary Social Theory is pretty much the hardest one I have, and I have a lot of hard classes!!
Charlotte.. you're going to be pissed but picture it... I was wearing pink knit beenie, a gray sweatshirt ( inside out) black lounge pants, ankle socks and my navy blue house shoes when I could not find some articles that I printed out the other day.. I was finally on a roll and in the zone about this paper and ARRRGGGGG , Where the capital H were some important papers... I almost cried, but instead, I said, " I'm just going to go to school and go the library..." that's right Charlotte, I was a hot mess in 5 different colors and didn't give a crap.. I went to school like that...ME!! and I NEVER leave the house undone!
The check out desk sent me to the reference desk and that's where I met him.. Austin.. bless his heart, he didn't seem to mind that I looked liked a homeless person, he just wanted to help and he helped... He helped me print out six more resources for my paper and told me where I could find a book by Bauman that the school library carried ( Barnes and Nobles and Borders do not carry books on post modernism and Liquid Modernity for some reason)... I heard the Angels singing... my paper is saved and I am still in the zone.. please bless I don't lose it .. My paper is due at one pm on friday....

( this post was a five minute time out because I PROMISED y'all a post every day for the month of December)

So, to the Utah Valley University Library and to Austin...Thanks for saving my paper, and my blog

ps... there are a lot of cute guys who hang out at the library..why haven't I gone there all semester?????

it's nice to feel special sometimes......

2008-12-03T18:07:00.003-07:00

side note.... I have 6 Melissa's in my phone and I talk to all of them!! I love them all.... but I digress... This blogging everyday for the month of December is harder than I thought, but right now I'm feeling sentimental, and this might be a little different than my usual stuff....do I have usual stuff since I am so sporadic in blogging, hmmm... yes :-)

I have girl's date night with my friend Melissa every monday night...we call it girls night, because a boy use to come, but he bailed on us.. but anyways, now it's girls' night until he comes back if he ever does... but we spend a little time every Monday dancing around the living room to our favorite jams, and I like to dance with one hand waving free... I got that from a movie, " Elizabeth Town" some people don't like it, but I did, and I own it! but anyways.... I have a new favorite singer this week I'd like to share with you... I wanted to share Adele's song called " Chasing Pavements" but I couldn't get the embedding code, so here is another song that I love of her's...

it's called Hometown Glory:

Melissa and I have these little matching journals.. in them we write whatever thought we hear that we just love! We get alot of our quotes from television ...And this past week I saw a movie with my friend Becky and I got a quote from it...
" It's just nice to feel special sometime." I put that one in my book

I'm having a moment people! I'm not sad, but I'm pondering special moments and the people who ever made me feel special and the ones that make me feel special....well, I'm pondering...enjoy the song, and you can find " Chasing Pavements" on You Tube as well... and Missi.. I'm STILL chasing pavements, so I am SO NOT the one to tell you if you should or shouldn't do the same....and Deanna... are you still " Chasing Pavements" ..

Oh Adele..you speak to me....you speak to me..

smiles

Running Errands

2008-12-02T16:16:00.005-07:00

I just love Costco... don't y'all... everything in that store is in bulk! Who needs that much? Well, I mean what single person needs that much right.. I'm sure that's what people think when single people go in to a Costco
" They aren't married, what could they possibly need here?"
Well, today I just felt like going is all.. I wanted to get some chicken because I'm going on a salad thing, and they sell it cheaper than at Smiths and Albertsons.. but I don't need to tell everybody that now do I?
" HEY EVERYONE I'M SINGLE BUT SINCE I ONLY WANT TO EAT SALADS WITH A SMALL BREAST OF CHICKEN FOR A FEW WEEKS I CAME TO THE COSTCO TO BUY IT IN BULK!!! THAT'S RIGHT A SINGLE PERSON IN THE BUY IN BULK STORE!!!!! "
At the Costco I saw the Asian chicken lettuce wraps..and they looked like a a good dinner for tonight so I bought a package...
I checked out, and had my receipt in my hand for the lady that looks through your stuff when you leave

Nosey Costco Lady: " Oh you know what I do with the lettuce wraps, I buy some of the chicken strips and cut them up and add it to the chicken it comes with and the sauce, I don't know about YOUR husband, but MY HUSBAND doesn't think there is enough chicken that comes with it, and I found that works and he's happy."

Me: " Oh that is so nice to know... I'll keep that in mind.....and WHEN I GET a husband... I'll try to remember that, THANKS "

I just love Costco

2008-12-01T13:53:00.007-07:00

Sorry to Keep you waiting

2008-10-17T10:10:00.004-06:00

I want to rename my blog, letters to the Crazy Lady... it's kinda sad when I think about it, but my life is so boring right now...and the highlights are all the things that I want to say to her but won't because deep down I'm not as mean as I say I am...even if I did yell at these two kids last night who were pretending to be crippled that I hoped that they got hit by a bus, because it's wrong to fake being in a wheel chair when there are people who really have to be in in one....
I mean maybe I could write about my crazy ex who just recently started calling me and texting me again, but I reminded him that even though I have little to rate him against, he WAS the worst kisser I ever had to kiss and there is no need for him to continue calling me...but then, he might come across my blog and be offended and I wouldn't want to hurt the fragile male ego right....
so hmmm...

Dear Crazy Lady,
**
Seriously..you do laundry EVERY DANG DAY...that's suppose to be for both our apartments.. What, I'm suppose to ask you if I can wash a few loads? No, I don't think I want to do that...what, do you only have one outfit, do you HAVE to do wash everyday..think about the water you are wasting for a minute....does your dang dog pee on stuff? Why the heck are you doing laundry EVERY FREAKING DAY? AND a better question is, why the Heck do you start doing wash at 6 am..for the love of Pete..calm down!!!

Oh and Dear Crazy Lady,

Stop being mean to the nice old man next door. He's SPECIAL, like SPECIAL, and YOU of all people have the gall to call him crazy? HAVE YOU LOOKED IN THE MIRROR?! He's a sweet old man who plays red light green light with the little kids across the street...he likes the green otter pops in the summer and he calls me kido.. He's sweet..and kind and has the mental capacity of a nine year old ... You are a day pass crazy and have the nerve to be mean to him... Well, I have his back and I just won't stand for it.. I don't like you or your ugly dog.... by the way, if your dog continues to howl for hours on end... I might have to suggest you get it's voice box removed...

Have a great day

Side note to Barb and Charlotte, my favorite sisiter in law and my favorite cousin:
now that we're an eternal family...you're stuck with my meanness....I hope that y'all are okay with that.. I love you both so much!!!

** crazy lady doesn't REALLY look like that...but I might post a picture of her ugly dog that is barking RIGHT NOW !! I HATE THAT DOG

...in the end

2008-08-23T09:43:00.003-06:00

...it's like that one thing I heard...people meant to be together always find their way in the end...so hopefully your hand will fit in mine,and my place will be in your arms; we'll find comfort in each other...and it won't be too long til we find our way.

so....I'm going to have to start over

2008-07-16T11:18:00.003-06:00

the lady in the basement has pushed me over the edge..and I've been keeping something from you since it all started...she's driven mad..and I am back to drinking soda AND swearing....ugh.. I just needed to make it vocal ( can it be vocal since I am typing this...) well, she and some one else have made it near impossible for me not to say potty mouth words...so in another effort here I go again.... this is day one of no swearing..well... I'll start tomorrow.. I almost forgot that I've been up for a couple of hours and I've already said a few choice words..BLAST !

hmmm....since I've been good about not saying the really really bad ones.. I'm still going to be proud of myself for the long run that I had..it was the longest ever to say the least...

and so tomorrow it begins...no swearing...

I'll give up soda again after my friend Emma comes back to town..she visited the wonderful state of North Carolina and is bringing me back some cheerwine.. I am too excited and yes.. I'M GONNA DRINK IT !!! YUMMY

No you'll never get a chance....

2008-07-01T23:14:00.007-06:00

so tonight I went to dinner with some friends, I LOVE my friends..well..one guy was new, and he wasn't my friend, but when he told me about serving a mission in North Carolina and for his love of Bojangles Boberry biscuits...I thought we could be friends...I thought it was the start of a BEAUTIFUL relationship...and then at dinner he miss took me for a Tarheel fan, which is a honest mistake, so I was like, no, I'm a DUKE fan.. I'm a die hard blue devil..now, having served in the south, in North Carolina, you would think that this boy had some common sense.. and would've kept his mouth shut after that.. I mean SERIOUSLY there are certain things you don't discuss in order to maintain friendships... 1) Politics 2) Religion 3) the Duke vs UNC rivalry .. well he just kept going on and on..and he had the nerve to say that Coach K was an evil man ... I threw food at him in the restaurant.. and salt, and Ice, and I wanted to throw my Dr. Pepper at him since soda has a tendency to stain.. I even eyed the ketchup bottle ( it was the squeeze out kind... that boy had the nerve to touch me.. and want to hold my hand!!! AND TOUCH MY KNEE... he would wink at me and say we could work it out.. I was like, " The hell we can, I'm calling my momma." ( Carolyn, not the one down the street from you, my mom mom here in Utah who wants me to tell you hello) anyways, I told her what a jerk I was sitting with, and then I handed him the phone so my momma could call him a jerk...and he thought I was playing...
Now Coach K isn't Joel Osteen or anything, but he's a great man, and a great leader, and a nice man..you don't have to like DUKE, and on occasion, I've even cheered on Carolina when it came down to it...especially if they were playing Maryland..but seriously, don't disrespect Coach K..you don't see me calling Dean Smith a MORON...good golly.. I've been hot about this since dinner.. I needed to get this off my chest.. Brandon says that I will forgive his friend..and CeCe says, that she is staying out of cause she has never seen me mean before and doesn't want the wrath..me.. hmmmm I don't think I can get over that....

END OF RANT

I'm raising my pentacostal hands for you Charlie

2008-06-23T23:25:00.008-06:00

I'm prideful when I talk about home.. my home, the place I grew up. I do believe that I had the best time every growing up.. I had the best friends ever, and I lived in the best state in the union... North Carolina...where I learned that a cook out is when you have hamburgers and hotdogs on a grill.. a barbeque is SO MUCH more than that, it's a pig pickin... they always get that wrong in Utah... and a purse is where you put your change, a pocket book is where you put your change purse, and a bill fold, can also be called a wallet....and so what if I still say oil in a way that makes you laugh, it's the proper way to say it... I dated a guy once who said that he knew I was mad and I said how so, and he said, your accent comes back..oh bother...that boy was dumber than a ten pound sack of stupid... I could tell he was lyin every time his lips moved.... but I digress.... I have a confession to make..something about me that will never, no never change.. I love T.V evangelist and Christian Rock....Joyce Myer ( the preacher lady), Joel Osteen ( I was too excited when I got to go to his church last month when I was in the Houston area... happy heart)... I still sing Michael W. Smith Songs, and DC talk.... I have ALL their cds.. I just can't give it up... sometimes when I'm getting ready in the morning, it's all I can do to not raise my pentacostal hands while I sing along...Char, I just feel it sometimes...

....there's someone else

2008-06-21T13:36:00.001-06:00

You hold my hand and kiss my face... I kiss you back. You say that you love me, and in some way I know that you do, but I'm not IN love with you, and you're not IN love with me. That's the thing about replacement people, we fill the void that someone else has left, so we don't feel the emptiness, so we don't feel the hurt. It's not that we don't care about each other, it's just that we care about someone else more....

I'm kinda sorry

2008-06-12T23:20:00.006-06:00

Dear Crazy Neighbor Lady that lives in the basement apartment,

I'm sorry if you get evicted, I really kinda am, but that dog you have jumps on people, and it's not cute...and you say it's a therapy dog but you leave it alone ALOT and every time you do, it howls and yelps and barks...just the other day I thought you were dead in the basement. You told me that you have all these problems with you, and how that dog saved your life that one time.. I thought history was repeating itself, and you were in some type of coma, or dead or something... maybe you fell and couldn't get up, who knows, and so I had my friend come with me to check on you, since you don't have a phone to call you on..well, your doggy cried and barked..and you were just at the store...FOR AN HOUR !!!
And you lock the laundry room that we are suppose to SHARE, you say it's because guys are at my house alot that you don't know..( um, lady, my friends aren't the ones that are CRAZY), but it's really inconvenient for me to have to knock on your door so you can unlock the laundry room that we are suppose to SHARE, (remember how the back door to my place is just as easily accessible by the people you have coming to see you..)
and today, I got to come home early from work, and I wanted to take a nap..and I guess you were gone again, because YOUR DANG DOG CRIED and HOWLED and BARKED for TWO FREAKING HOURS before I had to go to Velour for battle of the bands....needless to say. I REALLY hate it when I can't take me naps....so...if you get kicked out....I'm really kinda sorry...

ps... I think you should know that although I'm polite and say thank you when you bake me little treats...I don't eat them...I throw them away...it's just cause I don't know you..and you let your little dog jump on everything..it grosses me out...sorry.

sincerely,
me

ps.... 6/13/08

this morning, like last morning you decided to do laundry at 6:30 in the morning...oh, that's the same time that I start getting ready for the day...um, I hate it when the water turns cold...you're home all dang day....MUST YOU DO WASH WHILE I'M IN THE SHOWER !!
I'm starting not to feel bad about the possibility of you getting kicked out!!

Breaks Over

2008-06-08T23:17:00.001-06:00

...so I took a month and a half off..for this I do apologize....stay tuned, because I have A LOT to say.... *sigh* so much to say..

LOVES LOVES LOVES

Seriously, ARE YOU FREAKING KIDDING ME ?? SERIOULSY ?!?! $%^#$

2008-04-15T22:13:00.007-06:00

*** Since I've had a few hours to cool off, this blog is edited for content and now rated at LEAST PG-13***

Ya know...I think it takes a lot to make me mad,I mean, I've taken anger management twice and I think that I've come a VERY long way, especially now that I have eliminated alot of the language that comes out of my mouth ( I've let some bad words slip...) BUT TODAY, TODAY I get an award for holding my temper..
( Knock Knock) ( cause the doorbell at my house doesn't work)
me: "hello"
one of two men from Provo City: " hello, we've had some complaints about this chair on your front porch."
Me: " So,( then I pause for a nano second, I realize that I was being rude) Are you serious?"
Man: " Yes, well it's against zoning to have a house item on the porch."
Me: " Well, I had some really cool vintage chairs on my porch that belonged here, and someone stole them, so I'm just hoping someone steals this too, and saves me the trouble of getting rid of it."
Man: ( he has a shocked look on his face) " Um, well, it has to be moved"
Me: I'll stick it in the yard then and someone will come pick it up."
Man: " Do you think someone will?"
Me: " Did you not hear me, someone walked onto this porch and stole the other chairs, how about if I put a sign on it that says FREE?"
Man: "Well it has to be gone in 14 days"
Me: " oh good gosh, fine whatever, come back in 14 days and it will be gone."
Man: " Okay..."
Me: " and PS..only in FREAKING Utah! "
( I shut the door on them as they are talking, I don't need to hear it... I mean, SERIOUSLY...SERIOUSLY??? %$#^@#....Ya, know, I deserve the award for keeping what was in my head from coming out of my mouth ... I KNOW I can get loud, and I KNOW that I am mean, but bless my soul for not cussing those two stupid @#$%^#@ #$%^#@$ out... SERIOUSLY!!???
So, I called Captain Awesome to bring his car over so we could move it since he drives an SUV and of course, he's awesome so he comes over, but we have to run errands first...maybe he thought the drive would calm me down, but ya know what I saw on our little drive...I saw a old mustang parked in the front yard of some house, I saw a LIVING ROOM set in another...a computer desk on a porch...trash littering the streets, a couple of homeless people taking their belongings around town in stolen grocery carts, and graffiti drawn by the bored bad #$$ youth of the city...YEP... Ya know what Provo City... why don't you hire someone to pick up the litter, why don't you hire someone to paint over the crap spray painted on buildings, why don't you freaking find something for teenage kids with parents who don't watch them, something to do...WHY DON'T YOU FIND A PLACE FOR THE HOMELESS TO LIVE, so they aren't roaming the streets and WHY DON'T YOU GET OFF MY FREAKING BACK ABOUT A CHAIR ON MY FRONT PORCH THAT MY FRIEND SITS IN WHEN HE COMES OVER!!!???
ARE YOU FREAKING KIDDING ME? I mean, I get a ticket for a head light that doesn't work, never mind that there are more pressing issues like , I don't know the war on drugs to deal with, my little head light is a big deal..and now , I need to get a chair off my porch, because , humph, maybe someone thinks it's an eye sore...well I think little girls with white tights and black patent leather shoes is an eye sore, but you don't see me going up to their mommas saying, "Please lady, white socks and black shoes ARE NO GOOD!" I think when people pierce the middle of their bottom lips look RIDICULOUS,but I don't walk up to them and say, " EWW, gross, how do you kiss with that?" SERIOUSLY IT WAS A CHAIR ON A PORCH! Give me a %$^#@# %$%^&*^ break!
I've been wearing this bracelet on my ankle, first til my friend Goob came home from Afghanistan, then til Court, my best friend Lisa's husband came home from Iraq and then I decided I was going to wear it til the war was over completely...I still have it on my ankle ( almost six years later) so it seems to me like we have more pressing things in the world to worry about then some stupid chair on a porch that is part of a house that I pay more than $600 dollars a month to live in...

An End to Soda drinking...so long fizzy drink

2008-04-07T11:21:00.012-06:00

I love soda, I just do... I just love it...I love the way it just fizzes in my mouth and perks me right up on long hot summer's day, and back home there is this WONDERFUL soda that is only made in the Carolinas that is simply so yummy, once you taste it you're pretty much hooked...that's right..CHEERWINE..IT'S SO GOOD !!!!!
..DID YOU KNOW...ONE can of pepsi in a load of luandrey can remove oil and grease stains from your clothes..the kind of oil and grease stains you get from working on cars I want to add...did you also know that a can of coke can remove hard water stains from your toilet and shower....AND did you know that a can of soda can remove that crusty white stuff off of your car battery...hmmm....now if can remove all that stuff what is it removing from the inside of my body when I drink it..."Besides the increasingly explored link between high fructose corn syrup and American obesity, there are questions about how heavy soda consumption reduces the effectiveness of some antibiotics and how it indirectly increases kids’ likelihood for osteoporosis (because they’re replacing milk with soft drinks and thus lacking calcium). While we can’t believe every anti-soda claim, if even a fraction of them are true, we need to change our habits."

"Waist Widener Sweetened drinks can pack on the pounds. If, on average, we're drinking 18 ounces of liquid candy daily, we're adding about 225 calories to our diet. Over the course of a month, that's almost 7,000 additional calories, which can easily translate to a 2-pound gain. Over a year, these drinks could be adding 24 pounds to our bottom line." I don't know about any of you, but MY BOTTOM line, doesn't need any help....
"Drinking soda not only contributes to making people fat, but it also stresses the body's ability to process sugar. Some scientists now suspect that the sweet stuff may help explain why the number of Americans with type 2 diabetes has tripled from 6.6 million in 1980 to 20.8 million today."
So....this is it..wish me luck and good health, because the next 28 days are me giving up my need for soda...my need for the morning can of Dr. Pepper....my need for the ups guy to bring me my case of Cheerwine all the way from North Carolina...
can you please pass me the FiJi
... I'll only be drinking water now....*sigh*..this is DAY ONE and it is hard already, but I can do it...

I wouldn't last a day locked up....a lesson learned...

2008-04-04T11:18:00.010-06:00

....It all started when I got pulled over at the end of the worst year ever (2007)

officer : " do you know why I pulled you over?"
Me : " No "
Officer: " Your right head light is out "
Me: " that's it"
Officer: " Yeah, are you driving home at this hour, do you live near by"
Me: " Two blocks down the street."
Officer: " I'm writing you a citation, go get it fixed."

later on the phone to my friend Kiyomi.. me: " Don't they have criminals to arrest... I WASN'T SPEEDING OR ANYTHING AND THE OTHER HEAD LIGHT WORKS! #$%^....%$#%#@$%! "

later that week,

Me: " Matt, can you help me replace a head light...I got a ticket for it."
Matt: " Do you mean you want me to fix it while you watch.."
Me: " I can watch tv while you fix it."
Matt: " Come over"
Me: " Thanks"

so I got it fixed..and time when by...and a letter came in the mail...

You didn't come in regarding your citation so now you have a fine.... $91

me: " $%#%$...%$^$%^" ( this was when I still had a potty mouth )

time went by....the money is on my dresser....I got a letter in the mail...

you didn't come in regarding your fine...your drivers license may be suspended....

(I no longer swear)

me: WHAT THE DEVIL?!?"

district court office
operator: " How can I help you?"
Me: "I got a notice in the mail about my license being suspended...I didn't pay a fine on time."
Operator: " Your Name"
Me: " Michelle"
Operator: " And your last name"
Me: "Oh yea, sorry...."
(I gave her my last name and the case number...there was a long pause."
Operator: " Michelle, um, well, there is a warrent out for your arrest now."
Me: " Please tell me you're kidding..are you serious...all for my head light.."
Operator: " AND you forgot to come in dear."
Me:" I've never been to jail...I've never been arrested..."
Operator: "It's okay dear, just bring in $164 and we can take care of it."
Me: " Or I go to Jail."

....do you know me? I wouldn't last a minute in JAIL! I can't even use a public rest room, let alone a potty in the middle of a cell...WHAT THE DEVIL? JAIL!

Me to boss: " I have to leave work early"
Boss Eric: " Why"
Me: " I have a warrant out for my arrest..I have to pay a bond or bail, I can't remember what the lady said, I have to pay today, and then take a paper to the DMV so they don't suspend my license"
Eric: " Can we call and tell them where to pick you up so you leave in handcuffs?"
Me: " Not funny..."
Eric: "Yes it is.."

I'm on the run from the law now...I'm going to run to the district court office so I can pay this whatever it is I have to pay....
NOTE TO SELF : Never put off til whenever what you really ought to do right now.

I need a nap

2008-03-31T12:19:00.003-06:00

it's the middle of the day and I long for the days when I was in school and nap time was a requirement.. Oh I want a nap so bad.. I want to crawl under my desk and shut my eyes for few minutes....

So long Dirty Mouth

2008-03-28T11:02:00.003-06:00

I can't believe it...My friend Reagan says that it takes 28 days to form a habit, or to break one... (it also takes 3 months to get in shape and 3 weeks to get out of shape) and with all that said... for the last 28 days I've been careful with what comes out of my mouth in the heat of the moment... I am no longer that potty mouth girl who says things like @%$# or %$@^&% I don't even use filler words that much, I just don't swear.. IT WAS SO HARD, like that one time when I almost got side swiped on my way home from work...or when this girl came into Velour and was so rude...ugh ^%$@&^, she made me so mad...but no.. I didn't cuss any of those people out and I even held my temper...SURPRISE SURPRISE...
In all honesty I've even had to stop myself mid swear, but I think it's okay, I mean, I went from swearing like a sailor to not in 28 days...give me a break...
hmm...what is there for me to do now...I feel like I can do other things now, what should I work on next...
I have noticed that I am mean...maybe I should work on that....

it's funny to me.....

2008-03-21T12:05:00.003-06:00

okay...what about this one

Happy Birthday JJ

2008-03-18T13:04:00.008-06:00

There is not going to be 33 candles that you will not blow out on the cake that I will not take the time to make because you're not here to eat it...
And it sucks to think about what could have been...and remember when I use to think that 30 was old...but now I know that it's still young, and besides, you missed that birthday too...

Your mother put flowers down...
She always does...and I do my best not to run into her
I always do...

miss you

An apology to Men EVERYWHERE

2008-03-15T12:02:00.005-06:00

So... I'm that girl...that crazy girl who just can't be pleased sometimes..I don't mean to be, and I didn't know, or let myself realize that I was until yesterday afternoon...and I am totally okay with admitting it..in the hopes that I stop being that girl....
SERIOUSLY, sometimes I have to admit that for guys, with us ( Females) it's a lose/ lose situation.. How do they ( Men) put up with us?
STORY : last summer I was hanging out with this guy. He was nice, and we developed a fast friendship shortly after I stopped hanging out with this other guy who turned out to be a total ^%#@&*$ LOSER and ^%$# face , anyways, I was missing the little rat and friend guy decided to tell me what he thought of me... he was so kind when he let me know that I was a "independent woman with a GREAT personality and a GREAT head on her shoulders that any man would fall in love with on the spot". .. (now sweet huh) I was SO PISSED! What the heck kind of crap was that?!?! was he freaking kidding me? I went to work at my venue and told Corey how mad I was and why; and being the man that Corey is...Corey called me an IDIOT. you want to know why I was mad? I was mad because friend guy didn't say I was pretty...( SO SUE ME, I'M A GIRL)
...fast forward...I was hanging out with a new guy the other night , he's GREAT, he's AWESOME, he's CAPTAIN AWESOME...and he always says the sweetest things, the other night he tells me that I am "so beautiful and so fun"...cute huh? I was SO PISSED...you know why don't you, you're getting the way this is going by now....I was mad because Captain Awesome didn't say I was SMART! I want to be SMART and BEAUTIFUL...
Ah JEEZ...
I'd like to take this time to apologize to all the men in the world that I have screwed by acting this way... I'M SORRY!

I sometimes make out to Sports Center ( I wonder what my dad will think when he reads this title)

2008-03-14T10:39:00.011-06:00

We're ranked 7th right now... I KNOW I am not on the team, but I LOVE this team, I've loved them since I was a little girl, I love them so much, I actually catch my breath every time they go to the line for a free throw, that's right.. I hold my breath and hope with all my might that , that ball goes in..I mean hello " Winners make free throws! " my blood pressure goes up, and my head aches the whole game...I need my cushion (that means a lead by no less than12) please let me have a cushion...For the love of Pete, let's not lose at home...if you trail at the end of the first half, you better come out strong in the 2nd half....What's that? a player wants to leave early for the NBA, no on this team (well not that often)
The ACC tournament started last night...and then March Madness starts...you don't know what March Madness is.. hmmm The BCS should take note...it's a college basketball tournament...this determines the best of the best and anything is possible, (i'll explain this more on sunday, now is not the time) Right now, before the madness, it's conference play time, who's the best in the conference, and the Atlantic Coast Conference is the strongest of them all...which is why my heart is pounding and I can't seem to catch my breath.. I want Duke to win so bad!! Please let us win, please! WE had a hard year last year, and this year we've done so well, with such a young team..we've come so far...Winning the conference will prove that you should NEVER underestimate how are you far can go if you REALLY want it, and I really want it for them...
I'm going to miss the game tonight because I have to work, but no worries Charlotte will text me the play by play as told to her by her husband...and I will check my phone every two minutes for that update and holler if I don't get one...cause I panic when I don't get one...
if they lose, bless those that bring it up, cause it won't be pretty! and for my family's sake, let them win so they don't have to put up with my bitterness...they love me so much they feel bad for me when Duke loses (except for Joe who will tease me relentlessly , until mom makes him stop)
and if they do win....I love to watch the highlights on sports center....

yes Louis you are right....It is a wonderful world

2008-03-12T14:46:00.003-06:00

I've had this cold since last Saturday. I have this horrible cough, and my nose is tender from the hard tissues at work, I've since gone out and gotten myself the tissue with lotion in it...I like them better....
Winter seems like it will NEVER end, and I am sorely missing Sun Sun Mr. GOLDEN SUN...
Easter is coming and I am slowing making my new dress ( yes Veeda, I want a new dress for Easter, I'm THAT girl ) I hope to high heaven I don't have to wear snow boots with it....I hate being too cold...
with this cold, and this cough...I laughed at Missi today and her funny stories, and Becky too. I have 15 more days til I've broken my swearing habit (thanks LDC) I went outside for a break from work ( okay, what little work I do) and sat in what little patch of sunshine I could find outside my office....and Louis was right... It is a wonderful world....

Family Time

2008-03-11T16:34:00.002-06:00

Tonight I'm watching American Idol with my sister in law.... oh it's going to be a great night for us....

Gary Coleman is NOT NICE

2008-03-07T09:53:00.006-07:00

I wanted to write some cute narrative about my experience yesterday at the DMV where I had the not so pleasant opportunity of seeing Gary Coleman and his not so lovely wife...but it wasn't fun, and they are not nice people.

there we were sitting in the DMV, Chris, Drew and myself and I noticed the mixed match couple first...the boys were not convinced that the little brown man in front of us was THE GARY COLEMAN, so we waited for them to get done and turn around so we could see his face, although I had just watched a re run of Different Stokes just that morning on BET, so I was sure it was him..Drew started chatting with an old friend (apparently everyone goes to the DMV) and Chris took a business call on his cell (who knew how long we'd have to wait, so why not) ...well the tall red head and the short black man got done with their business and turned to leave and sure enough, me and my group were not the only ones who took notice to the little man with the scowl on his face (he really looked mad at the world) Drew said wow, and I said, " I told you so" and Chris a little too loud said to the guy on the phone, " Hold on, I'm watching Gary Coleman leave the DMV." Now, Gary's wife heard this and as the two huffed their way out the door she yelled in this weird I believe she wanted to sound sarcastic or something " Everybody stare it's Gary Coleman" I was shocked, and Chris asked if she heard him, and I told him yeah, and he made a comment about her, but she didn't come back...hmm...at first I wanted to be embarrassed that little scenrio took place, but then I was like, um, Hello, it's freaking Gary Coleman from tv, who isn't going to look...and seriously, if he was that insecure about it..he should've been, I don't know a regular kid who grew up to be a cop or something. I mean, isn't the reason people go into acting is so that they can be famous and have people look at them...NO ONE was taking his picture or anything, people were just watching him leave the DMV for crying out loud, and hello mean lady, isn't the reason you married him the fact that he is Gary Coleman, you can't fool us...he's like, OLD and you're like 21...and honey, you're no Anna Nicole and Gary for sure isn't no J. Howard Marshall !

I saw Donny Osmond once at the Albertson's in Provo near 24 hour Fitness..and he was nice..so nice...

#$%@&*^ DRIVE ALREADY #$%#%$

2008-03-03T09:13:00.005-07:00

" Um, Hey Lady...it's a stop sign, not a red light, you can go... CAN you PLEASE GO?!
There are no cars coming, you've clearly got the right of way, so you can go...What's that..oh I see, YOU'RE ON YOUR CELL PHONE..hmmm, shall I honk my horn to get you moving, or shall I just try to pass you...SERIOUSLY ...@#$%&^* DRIVE!
What..you're finally going to go and since you've pulled into the wrong lane you want to cut me off...I don't @#$%&^* think so..Why don't use your blinker lady, or how about this..GET OFF YOUR %$#@ PHONE, because it appears you are not a multi task type of lady...uh, no..driving and talking on your phone are not two things you should do together....nope they are not."

it takes 28 days to form a habit, and I haven't sworn in three full days.....

Change, Growth, Opportunity

2008-02-29T09:37:00.001-07:00

In the sixth grade my teacher Mr. Johnson wrote in my year book, " Miss Michelle, Remember the golden rule, he who has the gold...makes the rule." he wrote " Have a great Summer in everyone else's year books... In 7th grade Bio, I told Mrs. Reid that I REFUSED to cut up a frog, and I took mine in the back and buried it at Garinger Sr. High School (I had to do three extra credit reports to make up the grade and keep my solid B) I made poster that said, "Animals deserve to rest in piece and not in pieces" and my friend drew this little dead rat and frog for me (I don't draw well) I gave up eating meat, and I listened to Victoria Williams and Michelle Shocked and I was informed. I was liberated. my sr. year of High School I published an article on Censorship and dedicated it to the principle ( I can't even remember her name) that told us to go out in the world and "Produce"..."Produce What? Was I being taught to be a robot, not speak up and have my own opinions" I asked her in her office when she informed that the article that I wrote on condoms couldn't be in the school newspaper, because this was high school...my friend gave birth the day after graduation, go figure.
A few months ago on the way to a business trip in Florida, I saw a couple of LDS missionaries getting ready to hop on planes back to their home towns...I wanted to be funny and so I told them.."don't be shocked when you get home, but just to let you know...things have changed...A Mormon, A Woman, and A Black guy are all running for president." I thought it was funny.
2008 is a time for new opportunities, and much growth...serious changes..not just for me, but for everyone.
February is OVER, and it seems already that so much has happened in two months... I don't know who I will vote for yet...but I like that I can vote...and I like how the year is going so far.. I like how saying that no matter what, this is my year, is making a difference in how I approach each day. hey, they haven't all been great days, and I've already shed some tears, but I am happier on the whole than I've been in AGES... 2008 is GREAT

and now for a public service announcement brought to you by Will.I.AM....

my friend Joshua James will be performing March 14th at Velour Live Music Gallery

2008-02-28T14:42:00.002-07:00

Do as I say and not as I Do..um not so much

2008-02-27T16:03:00.011-07:00

I studied sociology in school. I wanted to be a therapist and help people and change the world. I still want to somehow make the world a better place, but not as a therapist, but I digress...anyways, I did equine therapy for a few years.. I got certified and was able to be an assistant in this really cool unique form of therapy. Equine therapy is where you use horses in behavior modification..now before you get ahead of yourself, people do not ride the horse in some way to change their behavior, in fact, they don't even touch the horses ( minus the first task) for MONTHS. What happens is the people involved do a series of task with non verbal communication and no physical touch in order to get the horses to respond favorably. It's so neat and so intense..it's amazing to me how much horses act like humans in certain behaviors, my horse especially.. I love Birdie , again I digress...
I taught people that things are choices, you just do them...I say that to my cousins all the time too. I said it to my cousin Rachel just this past Sunday.. and alot in the past as well (Dang Rachel, pay attention, I'm tired of repeating myself) I was always like, there is no try. if you want to do something, you make a decision, a choice to do it, and you make it happen, to say you're going to try is saying that it CAN'T be done, and the only things that are truly impossible are the things we don't attempt to do. "Can't never did" , someone use to say to me...
Well, here is where I realize that I am just like that bratty teacher I had in the 5th grade that to this very minute, I cannot stand.. Ms.Craig UGH, how did I become her I do not know, but she would say stuff, and use that crap line " because I said" (who does that?) and then you would see her do the very thing she told us not to do..(I HATED THAT )
anyways, I have this problem see... I swear.. I swear alot.. I have a potty mouth, I talk like a sailor, I have a mouth I shouldn't kiss my mother with.. It's awful..and if i kept up my swear jar, I'd have enough to buy my cousin Charlotte a trip out here first class , round trip...oh my, it's bad.. and I say, like I tell people not to say.. " I'll try" to stop...hmmm...I'm a hypocrite.. I suck...I'm horrible.. I'm guilt ridden..and right now, at this moment (actually from this afternoon on) I will no longer, that's right, I'm stopping right now (this afternoon) and I am no longer, never again a girl with a potty mouth. I'm not that girl that cusses out the little kids that mosh in her venue, I will no longer be the girl that swears at that little old lady that cuts me off in five o'clock traffic, I'm not going to cuss or fuss if in frustration ..nope, not me...like "orbit", I'm going to have a clean mouth.
I just need to say it, and just do it, and make that decision and stick with, cause if I can't do that, then deep down, I'm saying I don't want to..and I DO, I REALLY DO! I'm not a mean girl, I was just a girl with a potty mouth though..so in closing, I'd like to thank you VERY much to my very good friend who helped me realize what a hypocrite I've been to my sweet cousins, and that I too need to stop giving myself excuses, and easy outs...
So...if I swear, call me on it, and remind me of how bad I felt this afternoon..and give me 28 days (that's how long it takes to form a habit) and I will no longer need the cuss jar..I'll be a swearing free girl, young lady

Broken Record ( Formally Todd's )

2008-02-26T09:29:00.003-07:00

I seriously need to get better at blogging.. I'm not going to lie, I feel the pressure of having something totally interesting and informative to say... I read the blogs of my friends and I wish that somehow my life could be just as interesting...and it's not... but the other day I had the best time ever with my friend Mandi and low and behold it is something worth sharing.
Mandi's boyfriend Jacob is the cook at a salt lake city bar called Broken Record ( formally Todd's) and they have a completly Vegaen menu...now I am not one for Tofu, but Jacob did give Mandie a funny look when she told him that I would perfer eggs in my breakfast burrito instead of the tofu that he is known for...so I changed my mind and went with the tofu, since I'm flawed and want to please everyone and sometimes do not think for myself...and...it was good. Um, so yeah I liked it. I didn't finish it, but it was seriously yummy..So this time,it's okay that I didn't do what I wanted to do, but did what someone else thought I should do...now, eating at a bar is not something I do normally, and I know it's not something alot of my friends do either, but if you get the chance, order some thing to go..and eat it somewhere else, but seriously, try Jacob's tofu..it tasted just like eggs, but better.
here is a picture of cute Jake making tufo look like eggs and my cute friend Mandi kissing the cook good bye on our way out..

Black History Month

2008-02-22T14:37:00.002-07:00

Me:" Corey on your way to Velour can you do me a HUGE favor?"
Corey." What is it?"
Me. " I got a package delivered and I need you to take it to Velour so no one takes it."
Corey." What is it?"
Me." My hair"
Corey." YOUR HAIR IS ON YOUR FRONT PORCH."
( laughing)
Me." yes, in a box, and so go it, cause it's expensive."
(laughing) Corey" Some dog's probably running down the street with your hair."
Me; " it's in a box."
Corey." Sure, I'll go get your hair off the front porch"
Me." thanks, I'll pick it up tonight"

Did You Know?

To recall and celebrate the positive contributions to our nation made by people of African descent, American historian Carter G. Woodson established Black History Week. The first celebration occured February 12, 1926. For many years, the second week of February was set aside for this celebration to coincide with the birthdays of Black abolitionist/editor Frederick Douglass and Abraham Lincoln. In 1976, as part of the nation's bicentennial, the week was expanded into Black History Month.
Population Distribution

- As of July 1, 2005, there were an estimated 39.7 million black residents in the United States, including those of more than one race. They made up 13.4 percent of the total U.S. population. This figure represents an increase of half a million residents from one year earlier.

- The projected single-race black population of the United States as of July 1, 2050 is 61.4 million. On that date, according to the projection, blacks would constitute 15 percent of the nation's total population.

- The estimated black population of New York on July 1, 2004 was 3.5 million, the highest of any state. Four other states had black populations that surpassed 2 million: Florida, Texas, California and Georgia. About 85,900 blacks were added to Florida's population between July 1, 2003, and July 1, 2004. That is the largest numeric increase of any state in the nation. Georgia and Texas added 61,800 and 45,000, respectively.

- As of July 1, 2004, 59 percent of the District of Columbia's population was identified as black - the highest rate for this race group of any state or state-equivalent in the nation. The District of Columbia was followed by Mississippi (37 percent), Louisiana (33 percent) and Georgia, Maryland and South Carolina (30 percent each).

- 1.4 million blacks lived in Cook County, Ill., as of July 1, 2005. Cook led all the nation's counties in the number of people of this racial category. Broward County, Fla., had the largest numerical increase (17,900) between 2003 and 2004. Los Angeles County, CA., also topped the 1 million mark.

- 31% of the black population was under 18 as of July 1, 2005. At the other end of the spectrum, 8 percent of the black population was 65 or older.
Businesses

- $88.6 billion in revenues for black-owned businesses in 2002, up 24 percent from 1997. The number of black-owned businesses totaled 1.2 million in 2002, up by 45 percent since 1997. Black-owned firms accounted for 5 percent of all nonfarm businesses in the United States.

- 129,329: The number of black-owned firms in New York in 2002, which led all states. New York City alone had 98,080 such firms, which led all cities.

- 10,716: The number of black-owned firms operating in 2002 with receipts of $1 million or more. These firms accounted for 1 percent of the total number of black-owned firms in 2002 and 55 percent of their total receipts, or $49 billion.

- 969: The number of black-owned firms with 100 or more employees in 2002. Firms of this size accounted for 24 percent of the total revenue for black owned employer firms in 2002, or $16 billion.
Education

- 80% of blacks age 25 and older had at least a high school diploma in 2005. In states such as Colorado, the proportion was even higher - 90 percent. (Source: 2005 American Community Survey)

- 17% of blacks 25 and older had a bachelor's degree or higher in 2005. In many states, the rate was higher. Twenty-six percent of blacks this age in Colorado, for instance, had this level of education. (Source: 2005 American Community Survey)

- 1.1 million blacks age 25 and older had an advanced degree in 2005 (e.g., master's, Ph.D., M.D. or J.D.). Ten years earlier - in 1995 - only 677,000 blacks had this level of education.

- For the 2005 school year, 2.3 million black college students were enrolled. This was an increase of roughly 1 million from 15 years earlier.
Income, Poverty and Health Insurance

- The annual median income of black households in 2005 is $30,858. In constant dollars, this is up from $25,642 in 1985.

- $33,077: The 2005 median earnings of black men 15 years old and over who worked full time, year-round. This compares to the median earnings of $29,672 for corresponding black women.

- The poverty rate in 2004 for those reporting black as their only race was 24.9%. This rate was down from 31.3% in 1985.

- 60% of black citizens age 18 and older voted in the 2004 presidential election. That amounted to 14 million voters. The percentage of those voting is up 3 percentage points from the previous election. Blacks had the highest turnout rate of any minority group in 2004.

- 19.6% of blacks lacked health insurance in 2005.
Families and Children

- There are 9.1 million black families in the United States. Of these, nearly one-half (47 percent) are married-couple families.

- 11% of black children live in a household maintained by a grandparent.

- 46% of black householders own their own home, nationally. The rate was higher in certain states, such as Mississippi, where it reached 56 percent.
Military Service

- There are 2.4 million black military veterans in the United States in 2004. (Source: American FactFinder)
Jobs

- 26% of blacks age 16 and older work in management, professional and related occupations. (Source: American FactFinder)

- There are 44,000 black physicians and surgeons; 79,400 postsecondary teachers; 45,200 lawyers; and 49,300 chief executives. (Source: Upcoming Statistical Abstract of the United States: 2007)

Data courtesy of the U.S. Census Bureau

Be Comfortable in your Genes

2008-02-18T13:45:00.003-07:00

National Eating Disorders Awareness Week highlights the fact that body size and shape are strongly influenced by biological factors – such as genetics, while also calling attention to some of the new discoveries surrounding the role of genetics in the development of eating disorders.

Too often individuals struggle against their natural, genetically influenced size just to fit into that pair of “skinny jeans” in the back of their closets. Fighting your natural size and shape can lead to unhealthy dieting practices, poor body image and sometimes eating disorders.

"Question Messages Portrayed in the Media: The media sends powerful messages to girls and women about the acceptability (or unacceptability) of their bodies. Young girls are thought to compare themselves to women portrayed as successful in the media, assessing how closely they match up to the "ideal" body form. Unfortunately, the majority of girls and women (96%) do not match up to the models and actresses presented in the media. The average model is 5'10" and weighs 110 pounds, whereas the average women is 5'4" and weighs 142 pounds. This is the largest discrepancy that has ever existed between women and the cultural ideal. This discrepancy leads many women and girls to feel inadequate and negative about their bodies. It is important to realize that only 4% of women genetically have the "ideal" body currently presented in the media, the other 96% of women feel they must go to extreme measures to attempt to reach this unobtainable image. Many of the images presented in the media have been computer enhanced and airbrushed. The models' hips and waists have often been slimmed and their breasts enlarged through computer photo manipulation. Many of the women presented in the media suffer from an eating disorder or have adopted disordered eating behaviors to maintain such low body weights. It is important to start to question images in the media and question why women should feel compelled to "live up" to these unrealistic standards of beauty and thinness."
shape.

Warm Weather Boosts Mood, Broadens The Mind

2008-02-18T11:42:00.001-07:00

ScienceDaily (2004-10-07) -- Get out for at least 30 minutes. The positive impact warm, sunny weather can have on mental health and mood are real, according to new University of Michigan research.

See..it's not just me..everyone needs sunshine to be happy and healthy... I need a freaking vacation from this dang weather...

Happy Heart Love You Day

2008-02-14T23:54:00.004-07:00

I missed the old days where the girls ( lisa, Angel, and sharmila,) would spend this day together... Lisa, how could I ever forget " To Mr. Martinelli, who makes a damn good drink." fun times... all in all though, this , today being the first year without ANY of my girls or a "love" has been a WONDERFUL day... and so far it truly is turning out to be one of the best years of my life... I am truly blessed... my heart is full.

and on a lighter note, a video that made me laugh out loud... I will have adorable kids one day

( please pause my music first so you can hear this little kid)

Frozen in Grand Central

2008-02-13T20:13:00.002-07:00

I couldn't stand still for 30 seconds!

2008 is going to be GREAT

2008-02-11T20:55:00.000-07:00

remember that scene in "Goonies" where they are down in the well and Mikey is yelling at at everyone, he yells" Out there, that's their time, it's THEIR time, but us, in here..this is our time... It's OUR TIME."

Every year that sucked, or didn't go the way I wanted it to, doesn't matter anymore... My life is not ment to be easy I know that by now, but in the end, it would have all been worth it...and right now, this year, this moment....is mine... I was ment for this right now. and I'm yelling "this.... right now, it's my time, it's MY time."

I am not without the knowledge that some things may go wrong, some things may not work out..but for the most part...2008 is my year, my time to shine..and 2008 is going to be GREAT!

...."things are gonna change I can feel it...."